I have always told James “If it was anyone else, I wouldn’t have done this” (military lifestyle) but said that without experiencing any kind of deployment or any extended period of time away from him. With this being the first field op with no communication, I am starting to get a feel for how it would be if he were to deploy. It hurts. It sucks. It’s lonely. It’s sad. But even with him gone, I still feel so strongly connected to him. When he comes back, I will tell him with even more meaning and a better understanding that I would NOT live this lifestyle if I were with anyone else. But my man makes this all worth it. HE makes it worth every second.
6. December 2013